Wednesday, July 21, 2010

If you feel like getting angry... this shit.

Stupid fucking bitch

You forgot the fucking great big big deep fat fryer.

Can you spot the scratchings, beer and fags?

One of my mates won the lottery the other week - fucking flash cunt - look how he celebrated.

 Flash fucking wanker

Scratchings, fags and beer - I cant think of anything better on a Sunday afternoon when you are battling an almost physical hangover after three days on the piss.

Old school beni hedge hogs

Now some cunt might think this looks sweet, or some other cunts might think it's an art statement - but I think it's a fucking waste of cider - criminal.

Mind those mini rolls look OK for a quid

Scratchings my readers have eaten part II

Stuart Carrotballs loves the blog so much he was moved to email in his favourite brand of scratchin' and to tell me a little more - but fuck it, I cant be arsed typing that crap so I'll just cut and paste his email.

Alright Dan - I was down the labour yesterday and had a packet of these - bloody lovely scratchings.  However there a fucking quid in there.  Mind I did get a second pack.  Down the legion there only 85p - what the fuck is all that about eh?

Er..............Nice one Stu - can you at least describe how one of the fuckers tasted next time you cunt.

Birmingham International Food bollocks thing

Right then cunts - here's some more drinking, eating and smoking related shit for you.

A few weeks ago I went to some shit in Birmingham on my lunch break, it was just a load of fucking overpriced food that the resident office monkeys in Brum lapped up - the cunts.

There was all sorts of over priced stuff up there - shitty Australian burgers for 4 queen heads, five pound plates of Paella that will more than likely see you shitting through the eye of a needle.  Although the Hogans Cider was a reasonable £3.00 a pint.

 Look at these cunts queuing for fucking noodles - twats
However - on closer inspection it transpired there was a scratching stall.  Fuck me!

 That's a fucking bold statement Ray - I think I'll be the judge of that

So I went and bought a bag of "Britain's Best Scratchings" and for 2 shitters you got a dirty great big bag of the fuckers.

 I took them back to the office and ate the fuckers - lunch sorted, no massive dent in me wallet, no shitting water all afternoon and I was so thirsty by the time I finished work I got absolutely cunted whilst slaking me thirst.  Everyone is a cocking winner.

Oh regards them being Britain's best? close but no cigar.  Check some KVE out Ray you cunt, then try again.

Oh I was on Marly lights that day.